The anticipated new release by Amazon Best Selling Author, C.J. Wells, coming summer/fall 2015.

“You’re an asshole!A fucking asshole, actually,” she spits, and I roll my eyes; I’ve heard it all before.“There’s not even a word to accurately describe you…you’re a…a…DICK!”

Sighing, I finish fastening my jeans and grab my shirt from the floor.“That’s mighty feisty attitude coming from a chick that just sucked my dick.”Flashing her a wink with my notorious smirk, I pull my T-shirt over my head, noting her open-mouthed gape as I make my way towards the door.

“Lose my number, asshole,” she slurs.

Turning to her from the open doorway, I offer a final pull of my lips before filling her in, “Sweetheart, I didn’t bother to note it.”I just manage to close the door before the item she threw towards me smashes against the other side.From the sound of the breaking glass, I assume it was a picture frame?Maybe a lamp?Who knows?

Why women feel the need to throw things is beyond me.It’s fucked up.So, you’re pissed.Is fucking breaking something going to make you feel better?Maybe rethink the decision to throw yourself at the guy before turning on him for taking what you were offering.Or, maybe add your disclaimer before you wrap your lips around my cock - you know, the one that tells me you want more, the one that will tip me off to keep walking before I dip my dick in your happily-ever-after-wanting pussy.

And then they call me an asshole.Is it my fault if a woman approaches me at a bar?And just to be clear, by approaches, I’m referring to obvious ‘I want your dick in my mouth’ innuendos.

Not assumed.Obvious.

I never act on assumption.That would make me an asshole.Right?

Wrong.

I’m an asshole anyway, for excusing myself once I opt out of the non-disclosed figurative leash they try to collar me with afterwards.

I don’t do happily-ever-after.It’s bullshit.Fucking bullshit.I learned that lesson a long time ago.Four years ago, to be exact.

When she left.

She taught me that that bullshit doesn’t exist.Maybe I should thank her for that.Maybe I could…if her last words weren’t so fucking torturing…“You’re my always, baby, always mine.”

Maybe I could…if I could even fucking find her.

Maybe one day I’ll stop looking.

Maybe one day I'll realize she wasn't mine in the first place.